1st of the month

Ok, I am recentering myself. Here we are in november and there is not alot of time left before I am 50. Even tough I failed all those other days of the year: 304 to be exact, I still have 61 to do better.
This morning I went for my walk, 53 minutes, I did the first day of P90 and I went to the pool for 40 laps. I am really tired but I will move like this every day. It is the only way I can see the scale move down. I am counting my calories. And I will succeed.
I am tired, always out of breath, unable to bend down without hurting my knee. I look like I am 75 year old. Hell I saw 75 year old that are in better shape then I am.
I see my mom, 73, who is getting worst by the day. I do not want to be like her. Ever. I want to enjoy life.
I am an overeater and just like an alcoholic I have to recognize my addiction. And just like an alcoholic I have to take it a day at a time. I know that for the first few days I will have to take it a minute at a time.
Thankfully, all the exercises I did this morning occupied my mind so I didn't think of eating.
There is lots and lots of candy in the house because of Halloween and lots and lots of dessert because of the murder mystery friday night. But I am more a salty person so I will be careful to not have chips, bread and butter surrounding me.
I am commiting to be here every day and to be accountable for my choices.
P90 is a program that last 90 days. I figure that it isn't that long when you think that there is already 304 days that passed without me doing anything else then maintening my weight.
Here we go, God help me.